Romantic love: How to avoid draining the romance out of your relationship Part 1
Has the love and romance drained out of the relationship?
Are you poisoning your relationship without knowing it?
Well in this article I will be sharing new discoveries that will help you keep love and romance in your relationship forever.
First have a look at this video. Love and relationship expert Dr. Willard Harley speaks about how people unintentionally kill love and romance.
First Harley states explains what romance is: “Incredible attraction for another person.”
“If you feel incredible attraction for your spouse divorce is simply out of the question… It will bring the best out of you.” Willard Harley
When you have romance. the things you should be doing in your marriage will be easy to do, you will feel more like caring for your marriage
Can romantic love last for life? Does it only last for a short time?
Yes, Romantic love does not have to end!
Harley talks about:
4 types of marriage
- Some people don’t make it the get divorce 40%
- Some don’t divorce they permanently separate 40%
- 20% live together
- 20% are happily married and in love
Do you want to be in the 20% of people who are happily married?
Well you can be happily married if you make your spouse tremendously happy and avoid making them upset, annoyed or unhappy with what Dr. Harley calls a love busters.
What are love busters?
“A love buster is any habit that makes your spouse unhappy,” say Harley
Anything you do or habit that you have which your spouse doesn’t like will eventually drain their love for you.
These cause unrelenting pain and suffering over and over again which eventually takes their toll on the love and romanc your spouse has for you.
There 2 categories of love busters
- 1. Abuse and control (instinctive and natural)
- Selfish demands. Tell and expect your spouse to do what you want regardless to how he or she feels. This is different from asking the person politely. It is even better if you ask her how he or she would feel about doing it. The difference is that one is a demand and the other is a request. People tend to respond more and better to requests than demands. No one likes to be told what to do. Request motivates people much better than demands.
- Disrespectful Judgements: When people don’t respond to demands we are likely begin to think about them negatively. We will judge their character and think it is the fault of their personality.
- i. Carla did not get up to make John’s breakfast after he told her to fix something (he had just come in from night duty at the hospital) and he got really mad and called you a “lazy good-for-nothing.” So he is judging her character, which makes her worthless and not a good person to be with.
In part 2 we will continue to explore how to avoid poisoning your relationship with love busters. Click here to go to part 2 of how to keep romance in your relationship.
