Infidelity and what to do about it
Here is what to do to avoid an affair. Also find out what to do to overcome infidelity in your relationship. Watch this video and read the comments below to find out how.
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Did you know that most women consider infidelity or cheating to be more hurtful than rape or physical abuse?
Incredulously Dr Harley says the cheating is more painful than rape, abuse or even losing a child – that is very difficult to believe.
Harley in this video tells a story of woman who was gang raped during her teen years, later in life she was cheated on by her husband. She considered the cheating more horrible than the rape.
Do you think cheating should be outlawed?
Dr. Harley contends that there should be laws against infidelity because of the extreme pain it inflicts on the victims.
“There is nothing you can do to compare to the pain and suffering that you create when you have an affair” he says.
Here is an example of the hurt and pain of infidelity
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How does infidelity or cheating happen?
Harley says that infidelity can be triggered when ever the emotional needs are met outside of marriage.
What are these?
- Intimate conversation,
- recreational companionship,
- affection, beauty,
- domestic commitment etc.
Harley says that most people who commit affairs are surprised by it. It all starts out as innocently as friendship.
You should take extreme precautions to avoid affairs in marriages:
Here are some precautions he said you could take to avoid this painful experience:
- Find out and meet the emotional needs of partner or spouse are.
- Meet each others intimate emotional needs.
- Don’t let some else meet you major emotional needs.
- If you find that you are being attracted to someone else, tell your spouse.
Should forgive and forget if your spouse has had an affair?
No, Dr. Harley says, you should have compensation not forgiveness. The person should be sorry and repent. Then they should make up for what they have done by
- Never seeing or talking to the lover again
- Expect a period of moody withdrawal period.
- Learning the 3 marital goals.
- Learn how to make all your decisions with each other in mind
- Meet each others emotional
- Avoid love busters